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Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover
Behold the ironic end of Mike Pence, worthy of a Greek tragedy, or at least an O. Henry story.
After four years of non-stop, hard-to-watch, servile obsequiousness toward Donald Trump — a moneygrubbing sexual predator and pathological liar who embodies the diametrical opposite of the Christian faith that Pence claims to revere — Mike found out just how much goodwill that bootlicking earned him.
Less than zero, as Elvis would say.
From the very beginning, Pence had calculated that pleasing Trump and the MAGA base was his ticket to the Republican nomination in 2024. But Donald Trump is not exactly known for his loyalty. In fact, he has a lifelong habit of savagely turning on business associates, wives, employees, and even friends (if he can be said to have any) in the blink of a heavy-lidded Adderall-addled eye.
Even so, I doubt Pence thought his reward for his groveling servitude would be to wind up hunkered down with his family behind hastily barricaded doors in the US Capitol after Trump sent a bloodthirsty mob to murder him.
Can there be a more fitting image of what it means to serve Donald Trump?
Pence’s humiliating fate is emblematic of the entire GOP and the bleached-boned corpse of the conservative movement, thanks to its prostration at the feet of this…
